My Burning Loins

From the title I put in this post and what it is actually about are two completely different things, but they are related.  Trust me.

So last night, Xie and I were debating away like we are prone to doing and I was sitting on the floor smoking a cigarette.  Now pay attention to the fact I was smoking as it’s important to this discussion.   For some reason I started to get up quickly and smacked the cigarette on my knee.   It left a black spot on my pants I was wearing, but I decided to just sit back down and worry about it later.

A couple minutes later I was still smoking and I feel a kind of pinching in my crouch area.   A sudden warmness also.   I realize that when the cherry broke off the cigarette it landed on my crouch.   I patted it out and thought it was fine.  I was wrong.   It then proceeded to burn through my underwear.   At this point I’m standing up and Xie asks if I’m ok.  I say NO.   She asked what she could do as she was jumping to her feet.   I yelled NOTHING.   At this point I managed to literally tear off my pants and take off my underwear in the middle of the living room.  I guess it’s good we didn’t have guests over right then.

I think in the panic and ensuing chaos the cherry went out since it wasn’t found after the fact, and there was no charred carpet.   I do have a burn on my lower twins, and was quite angry as Xie was laughing away.  I admit in the grand scheme it’s funny, but not immediately after it’s happened (literally seconds after she was rolling).   The underwear held an entry and an exit hole.  Both the underwear and pants were placed in the trash, ruined.

I know that smoking is hazardous to your health, but I never thought it would be in this way.   My burning loins, literally.

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